Choices

I'm not a people person. I am generally friendly and at most times, there is a higher chance that you would find me with a group of people than by myself. But I like being around people that I know and I''m uncomfortable and almost awkward around strangers. And hence every time I get invited to events and parties where I don't really know a lot of people, I turn it down. Even when the person inviting me is a good friend. I don't like to be lost in a sea of people, starting from scratch and trying to make new friends. That seems like a lot of effort to me and not always worth it. There have been times when I soon figure out that I might actually enjoy it but it's probably too late to get out of the excuse that I just made to avoid going.

Recently, R and I have made this arrangement where we each take an evening of "me-time', during the week. So, every Wednesday evening, I focus on doing things that I enjoy; a drink with friends, shopping, watching a movie or whatever catches my fancy for the day. But after a few weeks, I was at a loss of things to do during 'me-time'. I had run out of most things and I went back home a couple of weeks too (!) And soon, it looked like I would soon lose my 'Me-Wednesday' evenings if I didn't push to make it last. And luckily, I got invited to have a drink with some friends after work and I happily agreed to go. Until, someone mentioned that there will be others (people I didn't know) going too. Suddenly, I was uncomfortable with the idea and started looking for excuses. But since it was too late to do anything, I just bit the bullet and went ahead anyway.

And I had fun. There was some interesting conversations with some good people. I won't say I made new friends but I might smile or nod at them if I see them again. But, it turned out that they were a bunch of foodies who loved Indian food. What came out of that conversation were plans for some experiments with Fusion-food for the following weekend. Although, it has been done before, my friends who were there that night and I decided to try to make some 'Naan-Pizza'. From scratch, no less!

Butter chicken- naan pizza.

Palak paneer-naan pizza

Pardon the bad pictures but this was the best I could do before they disappeared. They were   really great.

The whole experience was a riot, though. I had so much fun, making and of course eating the stuff later that I decided I must do newer things more often. We will definitely try more fusion food in the weeks to come and now bouncing ideas for the next one is a regular thing during our lunch sessions. Although, that Wednesday was just a starter for the whole thing, it was still fun! And I for one, will think twice before turning down invitations again.

Exotic

This is a guest post from my friend, Pizzadude. Being a foodie, he has written about one of the things he loves and knows best, food!

As far as I can remember, food is something which always fascinates me. Especially more if its some sort of “exotic” food. Growing up in a south Indian middle class family in Bangalore in the 80~90’s era meant that the only exotic food that I got to eat was paratha and palak paneer, during one of those rare moments when we went to eat at a North Indian restaurant (Omg, so exciting! I don't know what to order). As time went by it became more common and I think I lost interest in paratha and palak paneer very soon. 

I think it was also around that time that international flavours started appearing on the restaurant menus. I still clearly remember walking in to KFC with my friends and having my first taste of a vegetarian burger. Yum yum! This was soon followed by a slice of pizza and I was definitely hooked onto the latter. However, I hardly got a chance to eat it again almost until a few years later. Pizzas were expensive in the late 90's, especially more so for someone who got Rs. 300 as pocket money to last an entire month. 

I think its only after I started working that I ate pizzas (and other "exotic" food that I could get my hands on) a lot more regularly. Moving to Singapore also helped a lot to increase my exposure to exotic food as such. Over a period of time, some of the foods & flavours that I experienced have left such a lasting impression on me that I consider them as my all my time favourite foods. I thought of naming some of these food items which are very close to my heart. Here's a short list (gosh, I really love to make lists):

1. Pesto

Words don't do justice to my intensity of feelings towards this magic paste. It always manages to uplift my mood. I eat it it slathered on a slice of bread or chappati or by adding a dollop of it on my pasta. If I could marry pesto, I would have. By now, Sayesha is probably singing Pesto deewane, aha!

2. Pad thai

The first time I had it in was at Bangkok and that defined a whole new set of flavours that my tongue had not experienced. Its a must eat for me whenever I visit Thailand. In Singapore, I personally like the vegetarian version Thai express does (Pad thai Mangsawirat, if you are curious). Full of flavour and lots of vegetables!

3. Noodle soup

Oh, this is such a comfort food! Noodles, tasty broth and boiled vegetables. I also add a spoonful of crunchy fried onions. Love the flavour it provides. 

4. Pizza

My blog nickname is Pizzadude. Need I say more? :P

5. Brownies

Each time I eat one, I feel like singing, Yummy yummy yummy, I have got love in tummy :D The best I have eaten was at the small place in Bangalore, named Pizza Port. Shub introduced me to this place. Its a pity they are not open anymore. I really wonder from which bakery they got their brownies from. 

T is for Trapped!

Ok, I know I'm giving away a lot with the title, but you'll know what happened once you read this anyway. This is part 5 of the escapade series. You can find the rest of the series here.


The girls woke up and realised that they were on the train and would reach Bangalore soon. They freshened up and got ready to get down . They considered alighting at the Cantonment station, (which is a stop before the main Bangalore city station), just in case somebody was there looking for Vee. But they soon decided not to, as it was difficult to get to where they wanted to go, to Mee's friend's place. They alighted at the Bangalore city station and soon made their way to the cloak room. On their way, Mee tried calling her friend, but did not get an answer. Not sure where to go, they thought they would figure it out slowly. In their naiveté, they thought that they were now safe as they were out of their town. Little did they know that the people who had met Soo and Mee had alerted relatives in Bangalore and they were looking for the girls at the Bangalore city train station.

As they were walking to the cloak room, Vee saw a familiar face. For a moment, she forgot that she was supposed to hide. Before anybody realized what was happening, she went straight to this person and shook hands with him. Only then, did Vee realize what a blunder she had just committed. This man, Uncle V, had a sheet of paper in his hands. Slowly he looked at each of the girls and read,

'Tall and fair...You must be Soo' he winked,

'Tomboyish with short hair....you must be Mee', he winked again,

'Short and pretty, you must be Shee', he identified each one of the girls.

'Hello, girls', he said with an evil grin. 'I'm sorry but you have no choice, please come with me now!', he said as he winked again.

The girls realised that they had no choice but to follow the man. If this was anybody else, this scene would have been grave. But because it was Uncle V,  it was hilarious. The girls didn't know whether to laugh at him or to take him seriously. With great difficulty, they kept straight faces.

If you thought Uncle Chot was a character, Uncle V a.k.a the winker was totally something else. Each of his sentences were punctuated with winks and his mannerisms were extremely funny. He would chew tobacco as he spoke and spit every now and then. He would scratch himself randomly and his movements were vey jerky. He was a meek man and was terribly scared of his wife. His wife, Aunty V, was another character. She was huge and towered over her husband. She was loud, spoke her mind and never forgot to tell the winker how useless he was. In another time, the girls might have actually liked her but for now, she was the enemy.

The winker immediately made some calls to say that the girls had been located and that he was now bringing them home with him. Although, there was a situation now. He had come to the station alone on his scooter and obviously he could not take all the girls with him. Instead he stopped an auto-rickshaw (a three-wheeled vehicle, in India), made the girls sit inside and then told the driver to follow him. He now sat on his scooter and merrily rode away, convinced that the auto would follow him. In the auto, the girls guffawed away. They couldn't believe how stupid the winker was. All they had to do was bribe the auto driver and tell him to take a different route and they were pretty sure he would do it. But since they had no place to stay yet and they were hungry and tired, they decided to go with him. They figured that with someone this stupid, they could give him the slip anytime they chose to.

In about half an hour, they reached the winker's home. It was a nice little house with a big garden. Aunty V waited for them near the door. She gave Vee a hug once she saw her and nodded at the rest of them. Aunty V, was way smarter than her husband. Once the girls were inside, she made them put all their money on the table. This was her way of making sure the girls wouldn't escape again. Mee however was smarter. She always kept most of her money in a secret pocket. She made a show of emptying all her pockets while still leaving some money behind. Aunty V took all this money and hid it away. She then made breakfast for the girls and locked them up in the guest room. She told them that more people would come to meet them soon. Vee thought her parents would come and get her but it turned out that her parents were now actually in Hyderabad and doing something important. This meant that Vee would not get to see her parents anytime soon.

.....to be continued.

R is for Runaway Train

This is one of my most favourite songs but no, this post is not about that. This is the part 4 of the escapade series. You can find the earlier posts here.

With help from some others, the girls had found that Uncle Chot had actually put people all around town to keep an eye for Vee or any suspicious activities from her friends. They had to now tread with extreme caution. On the day before, they all prepped for D day carefully, packed their clothes and went to bed. The next day, the train was to reach their town at 7:55 PM and would leave from the station in 5 minutes at 8 PM.

Their plan was simple. Soo and Mee would get to the railway station first, look around for any dangers and then call the other two. When the coast was clear, Shee and Vee would come to the station and board the train, just in time before the train left. Also, Vee would cover her face with a scarf and make sure she would not be spotted before or after she boarded the train.

When D day dawned, their stomachs were in knots. They were nervous but extremely excited too.
They were determined to pull this through. In their young heads, they had to do this to make sure their friend was safe and happy. The previous night, Vee and Shee had made sure they had disconnected the phone at Shee's house so that Uncle Chot could not contact Shee's parents, at least immediately after they left. Mee and Soo had given specific instructions (with substantial bribery, of course) to their friends in their neighbours' houses not to call their parents if someone called asking for them. They had tried as much as possible to avoid getting into any trouble with their parents but they were sure they eventually would, and were ready to face the consequences. But for now, they had to be focussed on the task at hand.

At around 6 PM, they all bid farewell to their families and met up at Shee's place. They reviewed their plan one last time and then Soo and Mee set off. They were travelling with as little luggage as they could manage but girls being girls, they still had a lot. Soo and Mee went to the railway station at 7PM and true to suspicion, they found some of Vee's relatives at the platform where the train was supposed to come. They stayed out of sight and hoped Shee and Vee would be careful too.

At 7:45 PM, the train was announced. Mee and Soo went to the platform and still tried to stay out of sight. At one point, Vee's relatives actually saw Mee and recognised her. Now that there was no escape, Mee casually went up to them and said hello. She told them that her relatives were arriving from Mumbai and she was here to receive them. And then she asked them what they were doing here. They just mumbled something and then quickly left. And then the train arrived at the station. It was always a rush to board that train because the train stopped at this station only for a few minutes and a lot of people were waiting to board. Amidst that crowd, Soo and Mee were trying to get into the train as discretely as they could. They pushed their way in within a few moments. They found that the general compartment of the train was super crowded but they found a couple of seats and plonked themselves there. But now they were terribly anxious that Shee and Vee had not reached yet. In a few minutes, the train would leave and if they didn't turn up, Soo and Mee would be in Bangalore without anything to do. The four of them had not even discussed such a possibility.

These were the days before they had cell phones, so there was no way in which they could contact them. Soo and Mee panicked and found themselves looking out frantically for their friends. Then the train hooted, which was a sign that it would leave in the next minute or so. Their hearts were beating so hard, they thought they would explode. It looked like their friends wouldn't make it on time. But just when the train was about to move, they saw Vee and Shee running towards the train. Vee looked hilarious with a pair of dark sunglasses and a scarf around her face.They quickly boarded the train and all of them collectively burst out laughing. The train now started moving and slowly picked up speed. Soon, it was out of  the station and chugging away. The girls heaved a sigh of relief. They had made it to the train and they were actually on their way to Bangalore.

On the train, they realised the general compartment was crazily crowded. Thankfully, Shaan had booked them on the ladies compartment. They couldn't have imagined travelling otherwise. But still, some rogue ladies had put all their luggage on the seats and hence there wasn't enough room for everyone. Now that the girls were out of their town, they did not have to hide or shy away. They were ready to take on anything and anybody. High on adrenaline, they started to pick a fight with anyone who'd mess with them. So also, the rogue ladies, who quickly put their stuff down and allowed the girls to sit down.

Now they were thinking about where they'd go once they reached Bangalore. Mee had a close friend there, who she was in touch with. She thought her friend would definitely help them out. She had assumed that they could go to her house and probably stay there. Mee had tried calling her place a few times but had not been able  to reach her in the last couple of days. Mee thought that once they reached Bangalore, they could probably just show up at her friend's place. But they did not want to alarm Mee's friend or her parents, turning up with luggage and all. They finally decided that they would drop of their luggage at the cloak room and then go to Mee's friend's place after they reached Bangalore.

The train ride was fun and almost uneventful if you discount the little spats they had with the ladies around and the squabbles they had amongst themselves. But they had made a lot of noise, playing anthakshari, singing songs, giggling away and generally being themselves. They even could sleep a little that night in all kinds of wierd positions (there was no place to lie down!) and on each other's shoulders. When they woke up in the morning, the train was slowly edging towards Bangalore and they would be there soon. But little did they know of the surprise that waited for them. Nobody was prepared for what would meet them when they reached Bangalore!

....to be continued.

J is for Jackdaws

For all of you who've been asking for the next part of the Escapade series, I'm sorry for taking so long but thank you for waiting. And trust me, the story will be worth the wait! If you haven't read the first part of the story, you can find it here.

So, there they were, all four of them, wondering what to do next. Now, the reality of the situation hit them. Tomorrow morning, they knew Uncle Chot would realize that Vee was missing and would immediately call their homes to find out what he could. They had to do something. They also had to make sure that none of their families found out, or they would all be in a lot of trouble.

"Let her stay here and we'll keep her hidden", Shee said.

'But for how long?!, Your parents will eventually find out and then what?", retorted Mee.

Everyone came up with ideas, only to be shot down by someone else. Finally, one thing was for sure, they had to get Vee out of town and to Bangalore and they had to do it without getting caught! The reasons for choosing Bangalore were simple: Vee and Mee had actually grown up there and had a lot more friends there who could help (or so they thought). Also, Vee's parents lived there. Vee was sure they'd be very happy to see her and would eventually come around to see her side of the story. Methodical as ever, they decided they would break the plan into little bits and take it one step at a time.

Part one of the plan was to convince Chot that they had nothing to with Vee's disappearance and also to keep Vee underground, until they could take her out of town. Specific instructions were then given to Vee and Shee. Sure, they could have fun but Vee could not be seen or heard by anyone else. Shee could go out of her room but Vee had to stay inside at all times. They were also not to let anyone inside the room. Shee had to also make sure she would herself answer all the phone calls that were made to her house, so that nobody would get the least bit suspicious. Soo and Mee had no phones in their homes (yes, it was that long ago!). So people would always call their neighbours' places and ask for them. The neighbours were of course nice enough to oblige as long the calls were not routine or didn't end in long conversations. Soo and Mee had to look out for phone calls to their neighbour's houses and make sure their parents didn't answer them.

Once their plan was made, they all hugged good night and Soo and Mee went home for the night. Everyone spent the night tossing and turning, thinking of what the next morning would bring.

The next day morning, as expected, Chot called Mee's neighbour's place. As Vee's best friend, she was the first one Chot suspected. Promptly, Mee went and picked up the call. Chot told Mee that Vee's relatives had not found Vee on the bus she was supposed to be on. He asked her if Vee had said anything to her. Mee feigned shock and concern over her friend's disappearance. Chot asked if he could speak to her in person and asked Mee to come over to their house to have a chat. He also called Shee's place to ask if she knew anything. Shee also played her role well and said she'd come over with Mee to see if they could help.

Shee left Vee hiding in her room and with Mee, went to Aunty K's place. They had discussed in detail what they should or should not say. At all costs, they had to stick to their story. Aunty K and Chot were very nice at first and seemed concerned but more about the fact that they would be held responsible for Vee's disappearance, rather than be worried about her well-being. They asked Mee, when she spoke to her friend, the last time. Very innocently, Mee replied that Vee had said good bye a couple of days ago and had forbidden them from coming to the bus-station. She also told Chot that Vee was unhappy about being sent off. They told Chot that they were very worried about their friend and would help any way they could.

Chot, who was initially very quiet and mild, got very frustrated that he was getting no information out of the girls and turned hostile. The girls still stuck to their story. Finally Chot threatened Mee, "I am sure you know more than you admit but if anything should happen to Vee, I will come and catch your neck!". Forever the loyal friends, they refused to budge an inch and just stuck to their story. Finally, Aunty K told them to leave and to call them immediately if Vee were to contact them. They assured Aunty K that they would and left.

The girls heaved a sigh of relief and quickly rode back to Shee's place and related the morning's events to Vee and Soo. They described everything in great detail and had a good laugh about Chot's threats and how they had got the best of him. Part one of their plan one was a success! Now on to plan two: Buying train tickets to Bangalore.

...to be continued.

F is for Friends and Family

Family has been very important to me for a long time and has always taken priority over everything else. Needless to say, so have friends. I do not have 876554 friends on my FB profile but I have a few VERY good friends. In fact,  I can almost count them on my fingers. When I count my blessings,  I  would count my family and friends first. But I digress. This post is about something else.

When I was expecting Pickles, like all expectant moms, I had a plan. My in-laws were supposed to arrive at the end of the 8th month to have the baby shower and stay on until a week or so before the due date. My parents would arrive just as the in-laws would leave and then stay on for a couple of months. So, in any case, the plan was to have either set of parents around when the baby came. But Pickles, I guess, had other plans.

So, when I was somewhere in my 8th month of pregnancy and having a good time with friends, I thought I felt my amniotic fluid (water bag) leak and went to see my doctor at the hospital. Just to be safe, they admitted me and said I had to be on bedrest until the baby came. The baby, however, did not want me to be on bedrest for too long and arrived that very night!(more on that on another day). His arrival caught R and me totally off guard. We had not even decided on a name for him, not to mention, done any baby shopping for him at all. Since he was premature, he had to be in the NICU for a couple of weeks. I, on the other hand, was discharged the next day. I had no family around to help. I had a tiny baby in the NICU, who I had no clue what to do with. And I came back home from the hospital, minus the bump but without a baby. It goes without saying that I was terribly depressed.

I had no clue what I was going to do now. My parents couldn't travel immediately due to my dad's health and for reasons I can't remember, neither could my in-laws. In some sense, I was glad that Pickles was in the NICU, because had he been sent home, I would have freaked out because I had absolutely no idea how to take care of him.

When I came home, I had my friend, A, who did a small ritual to welcome me home, like my mum would have, had she been with me. I remember being so touched, that I held on to her and bawled my eyes out. She left after making sure I was ok and that I had food and after giving specific instructions to R about how to care for me. In the next few days, I went to A's place for several meals like she insisted. The only thing I kept doing was pumping breastmilk like I was advised to, every three hours, and promptly ferry it to the hospital, so that they could feed Pickles. It also helped that A lived closer to my hospital, so travelling back and forth was not so hard, between pumping sessions.

The next few days after that are like a crazy dream. Days just whizzed past with repeated daily visits to the NICU and trying to do some preparation to make  the home ready for the baby. It was at this point that my other friend P, who had her hands full with a 5-month old and another toddler, made sure she sent home-cooked meals for me. Not only that, she made sure she cooked nutritious food like she was given when she had just given birth. How she managed all this with two kids, is really beyond me. Even though I told her I was ok, she just kept sending food until the family arrived.

In between this, I had another friend, Sayesha, who went one step further. Because she lives far away from us, she decided she could not do much from being afar. She arrived with her little girl, Xena and stayed with us for a few days. She cooked meals for me, gave me moral support and also helped me shop for the gazillion things that needed to be bought for the baby. Since she had been through a similar ordeal, her being there provided a lot of comfort for me. At this point, I have to mention Xena, who was my personal stress buster. Having her around helped distract me from the yoyo of depression that I was going through.

Those few days were the hardest days of my life. Watching my little helpless baby in the NICU, dealing with the health issues that come with having a premature baby, dealing with the feelings of guilt that I was somehow responsible for his early arrival, all this was not easy. But I pulled through, thanks to my friends! Eventually, the in-laws arrived just on the day we were supposed to bring Pickles home. Later on, Sayesha even had a post-baby baby shower for me, because I had missed my baby shower. Do I have the greatest friends or what?!

I remember speaking to my mother everyday. She herself was feeling very depressed and helpless because she could not be there. And I would give her detailed accounts of what I ate and what I did etc. She always said "You are blessed to have friends like these. With them around, I'm sure you don't miss family at all." I am indeed blessed. I remember that when I came to Singapore, I used to think I'll never feel at home here. Now, I think, I feel at home and it is not because I'm used to the place. It is the people I met here, my friends, my family!

E is for Escapade

Would you believe me if I told you that I ran away from home when I was 15. I almost started to write out the whole story as it happened, when it occurred to me that I could make this more fun. I’ve made up some part of the story but most of it really happened. I will leave it to your imagination to figure what is fiction and what actually happened.

This story is about young girls from a small town in India. But our protagonists were anything but ‘small-town girls’. They were all of 15 years old. I spent a good deal of time thinking of a name for them; fearless (they were not!), fun adventurous (which they were) etc. but none of them did justice. In the end, I decided on ‘Jackdaws’. Like the birds,  they can easily be mistaken for normal crows but they are very different in being keenly inquisitive, high spirited and gregarious in nature. To be honest, the name is also inspired by Ken Follet’s book with the same name. In the book, the Jackdaws are an all female group of reniassance fighters. The girls I’m talking about had all the above characteristics and more. Let me first introduce you to the Jackdaws: I will just call them Soo, Shee, Vee and Mee.

Soo a.k.a the fearless one:

The most gutsy character of the group, she was almost fearless. She would stand up for her friends, whatever the cost. She was tall and pretty but on the flip side, a little daft as well.

Shee a.k.a the pretty one:

Very generous and kind hearted but because of which, she was super-gullible.

She was vain but also the prettiest of the lot. Born to a rich family, she had unlimited access to a lot of resources that the others didn’t.

Vee a.k.a the charming one:

Quite the charmer, she could talk her way through any situation. The story started thanks to her! Never one to follow rules, she was creative, fun-loving and a dreamer. She was the glue that held the pack together.

Mee a.k.a the smart one:

The most practical one in the group and the smart one as well. Always followed rules but the Jackdaws brought out the wild side of her. Extremely loyal and would always go the extra mile for friends.

The girls happened to meet in school. They got along like a house on fire and eventually got into a lot of trouble, both in and out of school. Soo and Shee grew up in the small town but Vee and Mee had both been brought up in the big city but had landed in the small town due to different circumstances. Now lets get to our story.

It all started when, due to family circumstances, Vee came to live with her aunt and uncle in the small town. Lets just call them the Evil Aunt K and Uncle Chot. Vee was very unhappy living with them. She hated the samll town and her aunt and uncle. She longed to go back to the city, to live with her parents again. Aunt K and Uncle Chot made life very difficult for Vee. But once she met the Jackdaws, life was bearable again. Aunt K and Uncle Chot did not approve of her friends and did all they could to stop her from seeing them often. Most of the adventures of the Jackdaws involved tricking and of course, making a fool of Aunt K and Uncle Chot.

One day, Uncle Chot told Vee that she to go to another city to visit her relatives. Vee suspected there was more to it than just ‘visiting’ although she did not know what. She suspected  that she was to be parceled off to another place but she didn’t want to leave her friends. When she voiced her dissent, he would have none of it. Her tickets had been booked and she would leave in the next two days. When Vee told the others, they were all heartbroken. She told them she didn’t want to go but she had no choice. They said their goodbyes and Vee told her friends not to come to the station to see her off, as Uncle Chot had warned her. He personally came to see her off to the bus stand, standing guard until the bus left.

Soo, Shee and Mee had decided they just had to say goodbye to their friend and see her one last time, no matter what. They stood hiding in the bus stand, and once the bus started, they started their bikes (I mean two-wheelers, not bicycles) and set off behind the bus. What followed was a very bollywood style bus-chase scene. Vee was so happy to see her friends but also sad that she was leaving them and waved goodbye. But the trio just kept following the bus. After about an hour, the bus stopped at the end of the town to pick up more passengers. The trio then went up to the bus and asked Vee to get off. Vee picked up her luggage and came down. By now, they were all in tears and in between hugs, they decided that Vee would just come back with them. And Vee did just that! And together, they just rode back to Shee’s place.

Shee’s home was a big place. She had a room to herself and could go in and out of the house without anyone finding out. So, quitely they all went there and plonked themselves on the giant bed in Shee’s room. Everyone was super happy and danced away for a while. Eventually, Soo and Mee had to go home. It was then that they began to realise the enormity of what they had just done. They had just helped their friend run away. The next morning, the relatives would call Uncle Chot and tell him that Vee was not on the bus. What now? Vee could hide here for a while but what after a few days. Uncle Chot would know they had smething to do with Vee’s disappearance and would come looking for her. They didn’t have a plan yet but they had to think of something. And fast!

To be continued.

Writing this post has inspired me to start a series called the ‘Escapades of the Jackdaws’. This is only part I of the story.

B is for Blah blah

And I neither mean the song nor the album. What I’m talking about is the good old gift of the gab, which I suppose we all have. It’s just a matter of the company we are with.

What inspired this post is a long chat with my bestie, who is miles away right now. We haven’t spoken to each other in ages but whenever we chat, we can pick  up right from where we had left off. We chat endlessly, giggling like a couple of school girls, laughing over silly memories and at each other, even hurling insults like no one else can or will dare to. After an hour-long conversation, when R asked me what we were chatting about, I didn’t have any specifics to give him.  I guess that is what is special. The fact is that we can go blah blah for hours on end but with no specific topic in mind.

I love my weekly chats with my mom, where I fill her in on the latest gossip in my life, complain about work or discuss anything under the sun and take notes for recipes that I want to try for the weekend. Of course, it is incomplete without some gyan and admonishment from ma for the mischievous things I admit to her.

I know that it is one of the special reasons why I love shopping with my girlfriends or have a meal with them. It is not so much the shopping or the food (well, it is that too) but what I love most is the conversations we have. It doesn’t have to be about anything important or specific even. Just that the tête-à-têtes don’t stop until we have to split for the day, and even after. Then again, isn’t that what determines whether you can be friends at all in the first place?

Of course, there is nothing like the good old-fashioned in-person, heart-to-heart, a stay-up-all-night blah-blah session. But with so many miles in between friends, a phone-call, a skype chat or a whatsapp chat is almost just as good.

I also have a strong bond with my first friends i.e. my sisters and cousins. I have not one two but 6 sisters who love me very fiercely. I have a different bond with each of them, one is my mentor, one is my role model, and one is my partner in crime in the family and so on…. you get the picture. So every time, depending on the issue at hand, I know which of them to call. I really have a support system that works overtime. Whether it is to bitch about R during a fight or to get a boost when I’m feeling low, I know it is there.

Speaking of R, he and I started off as very good friends first, who could talk endlessly about anything and everything. We started talking 16 years ago and we never stopped. We will grow old together and as long as the conversation flows, I know we’ll be ok.

Someone once told me, “ Food is the one thing that you enjoy at all stages in your life. It can make everything alright.” To that I say, "Food may not always do the trick but a pep talk from the appropriate person will right almost everything."

This is for you, V.

You ran away from home together, when you were still in school.

You committed all your first sins together like smoking your first cigarette and drinking that first beer.

You were a notorious twosome and they had many a nickname for you.

You know each other’s deepest darkest secrets.

You laugh at each other like there’s no tomorrow.

You call each other names that you would never tolerate from anybody else.

You don’t want to shop together because you know that you’ll end up liking all the same stuff and fighting over who buys it. Even when you don’t shop together, you end up with a similar wardrobe.

You can’t be any more different from each other, but you are still so much the same.

You really connect and can take off from where you left even after months of no communication.

You have so many memories together that you can’t even remember a life before you knew her.

She knows something is wrong even when you don’t mention it.

She’s your one-man cheerleader who also knows exactly how to cheer you up.

She has stuck by you through all your bad times and pulled you through it all.

She knows about all your unspoken fears, because she has the same.

She was mad when you left and 3 years later, she still gives you grief over it.

You don’t say it often enough but she knows what she means to you.

Only if you’re extremely lucky, just once in a lifetime you make a friend like that. I was lucky I did.

Of Friendships and Reconciliations

I spoke to a long-lost friend today. Actually, I met her online. We were very good friends during our college days and have spent some very memorable years together.  Somehow, we had a misunderstanding during our final year and we parted ways, still mad at each other. I’ve always thought of her fondly but never dared to say hi. Though there was many a time when I thought I should call her, I didn’t. Though I saw her online often, I never dared to say hi for the fear of being snubbed or something of that sort. Today, after 8 years, when I saw her online, I just couldn’t not wish her a happy new year. When she responded fondly too, I dared to say I was sorry, that I missed her all these years. And she said she was too. We didn’t even remember what we fought over. And we both realized how foolish we were and caught up like old buddies. And we realized that we had wasted 8 years. How I wish I’d done this earlier but I’m glad I did it nonetheless. Better late than never. :)

I just realized that it’s never too late to say hi to a long lost friend. Or to say “I’m sorry, lets forget what happened and go back to the old times again”.

And so I spent the day calling old friends, people with whom I’d lost touch. And I can’t begin to describe what a wonderful feeling it is to know that the bond is not lost, not even faded. That was the best thing I’ve done in a long time. Long distance calls to friends, I’ve decided are the best things that money can buy.

I’ve made some friends in the last two years who I’m really glad I met. And we have such good times together like we’ve known each other forever. I know that though we may all go different ways one day, but I’ll make sure I keep in touch. If I do one thing this year, that’s what it’s gonna be.

Like someone said, “ Make new friends but keep the old. Some are silver but others are gold”.

Here's to wonderful friendships, old and new … *clink*