Thursday, April 16, 2015

N is for No

'No', sounds pretty simple, right. How hard can it be to say it?

Well, it turns out that for some people (like me), this can be pretty hard. It's not like I'm a yes-man and I can disagree. But I find it very hard to say no to other people.

If at work, someone asks me for help, I always oblige. But sometimes, I find that I am running around, stressed and doing things for some people when they are actually relaxing with a cup of coffee. It pisses me off no end, but I just try to be nice. When they ask, I think they really need help but at times, I feel I am being taken advantage of. I'm trying now to draw the line.

Take another instance, I can never say I can't make it to a party. Or worse, if someone invites themselves to our home, I still can't say no. Due to this, I find that our weekend schedules are always full, even if I want to spend some quiet time with my family. R always complains that I over plan our weekends, when the truth is it just gets planned. I almost have nothing to do with it. Except that sometimes, I want to say no but I can't.

It's not like I'm the nicest person around and neither do I want to be. But I don't want to change the way I am just because some people take advantage of it (some without even realising it). But if you think, I'm a pushover, well I'm not. I can stand up for myself when the need arises. But it all boils down to this simple thing, I can't say no. I try but the words just get stuck on my tongue and I just can't spit them out. I admire people who can say no without any guilt whatsoever, even at the cost of hurting the other person involved. But that's not me. Neither do I want to be that person. I'm just saying that I want to be able to say no when nobody stands to get hurt and that will maybe buy me some peace.

So, what's your take? Can you say no? How do you do it?

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