That checklist in my head..

..before agreeing to a night out with friends.

Then,


"Do I like the company of people who asked me? yeah, sure!"

" Do I have an early morning tomorrow? Yes, no, maybe. It doesn't really matter!"

"Do I feel like going out? Yes, no, maybe. What the heck, I'm going!"

Now, 

"Can I ask R to come back home early at short notice?"

"Maybe I can ask the nanny to put him to bed! No, I should really tell R to do it."

"Have I cooked dinner for Pickles?" Check

"Wait, who'll brush Pickles' teeth?
R should really try but he won't. Its ok, I guess one night of not brushing teeth won't do him much harm"

" But will Pickles even sleep without nursing? He might but maybe not. Maybe I should get back by his bedtime. But that's too early! I'll come back if R calls to say Pickles is not sleeping."

"Maybe I should come back home after work and spend some time with Pickles and join them after he goes to bed! Yeah, right! That is provided I don't fall asleep by then! But I haven't seen my baby since this morning and he only woke up just before I left to work! Ok, I'll come home and spend sometime with him and leave in a bit, so at least I have spent sometime with him."

"But will Pickles let me go once I'm home? He doesn't even let me go to the bathroom without crying his heart out!"

"Will I be able to pull through tomorrow without much sleep, considering Pickles will wake up multiple times at night and super early in the morning? Oh no, I have that meeting at 9. Maybe I should skip it this time."

"It's really ok. I can go another time! I really ought to plan this better and in advance. I'll just cancel out!"

" But I haven't been out in a while..I really want to go out!"

"What the heck! I'm going!'

It sure isn't easy being a mom!